There was never a day my parents and I never fought. If it's not mom who's mad, it's dad. They are always mad at me even with slightest things such as being late by 5 minutes, or eating little and slow. Aside from that, I feel that their expectations are far too great that I cannot live up to it. They expect so much from me - to be good in both being a student and a daughter. Yet, I always feel like I fail them. That no matter what I do, it's just not enough. However, all these are caused by misunderstandings brought about by miscommunication.
My parents have always been busy with work in order to provide for us while I put all my time in studying so that I can make them proud. With our busy schedule, and lack of time, it's almost impossible for us to meet and spend quality time. We do not get to update each other nor do we get to make kwento like before and I understand why. But somehow, this has affected my relationship with my parents. I feel that they do not know me anymore or that they know so little about me. To add on to that, our age gap and growing up from two completely different generations have been causing more misunderstandings. For instance, my parents imposed a rule that I have to be home by 12AM sharp. And I hate it because, nowadays parties start late. By the time I leave, that's when the fun starts and so I always miss out. Also, I am not always allowed to go out. At the very most, once a week. I do not understand where they are coming from but when I ask them, they always say "it's for your own good." Where's the "good" in that?
It's fair to say though that there were times I'd be home past my curfew and I'd go out more than once a week. Well, I'm grateful when they would let it pass and forgive me. However, there was this one time that they were very mad. And I had to explain. I needed them to see where I was coming from. To understand me. I'm already 2o turning 21 this year yet I feel like I still do not have the freedom to decide for myself. That's the only time I understood them. It's not that they did not want me to have a life. But it's because they wanted to protect me. It sounds cliche doesn't it? But really, they said that the world is scary. It can be dangerous. Anything can happen to me when I'm out there. Worse, they won't be able to do anything or they'll be too late. They understand that we are a partying-til'-the-wee-hours-of-the-morning generation but they just cannot change their protective instinct just like that. And as much as I think that it is safe (people doing drugs for example seems normal to me), they think that it is dangerous and it can destroy lives- my life to be specific. They wanted me to achieve my dreams and become successful even if it means I'd see them as evil monsters because they love me. They only wish the best for me. As my parents, they want to guide me in the right path/direction and help me grow into a better person. Because of that, I remembered what they always say: "My success is their success. My happiness is also theirs."I live in a time when my motto is "You Only Live Once" while theirs was "You Live Only Once" and those two are very different from each other. The latter gives more emphasis on living life and its importance. It tells us to make the most out of the precious life we have and serves as a reminder.
With that said, I always misunderstood them. I believe it is because I was too busy that I never made time for them; thus, creating a big misunderstanding between my parents and I. They wanted me to go out once a week so that I can spend the rest of my time with them but I failed to see that. They wanted me home early because they couldn't sleep knowing that I'm not home yet and it makes them feel anxious. I always wanted it my way and asked them to understand me when I could not even do the same for them. Now tell me, what better love can there be than that of my parents' love for me? I am truly grateful and be more than blessed to have them. Sorry and thanks mom and dad for the love you both continue to give to me. 😊
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